Here’s something I haven’t mentioned on this lil tiny blog of mine. Perhaps because I’m scared of being judged and you will all run away muttering to yourselves “but I thought she was sooo smart and to find out she’s really just vapid…what a shame…” Because you guys all think I’m smart, huh? Have I fooled you long enough?
I check UsMagazine.com every day. I regularly read UsWeekly and People. I have the TMZ Mobile app. When Michael Jackson died, I knew it was true because TMZ said so. They know their sheet. Harvey Levin has crazy mad secret powers.
So you get it, right? I’m a little celebrity-obsessed. Just a little. It’s not like I talk to myself in the mirror and pretend that Oprah is interviewing me on my life. And it’s not like I’ve ever been caught by anyone lip synching into a mirror and pretending I’m Lady Gaga. Of course not, pshaw.
So when Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt broke up like forever ago, I was heartbroken. You know how people ask you where you were when you find out about 9/11? I knew exactly where I was when I found out Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt broke up. I was home on college break, laying on my bed, in my parents’ old house and my ex had called to tell me the news because he knew I would care. I was heartbroken.
How could this happen? If there was no hope for them, there was definitely no hope for me. They were the glory couple, the prom king and queen.
When I found out about Angelina, I was even more torn. I had always been an Angelina fan, I’ve even told Eric she is the one woman in the world I’d be willing to have a threesome with. TMI? Sorry, mom.
But I was angry with her for doing this to poor Jen. Team Jen? Team Jolie? Oh the tough decisions we have to make in this life.
You may think I’m a little crazy in being so invested in this. But reading about their daily lives, you become invested. Catching up with who married who, who dumped who, and what she was wearing–it all just adds to the fun. Of course I rarely share this secret, because I know what people think. Instead I pretend to be all interested in Newsweek and CNN and stocks and boring stuff that makes me sound smart.
Sure I keep up with the news, and sure I can hold my own in a conversation about the economy and healthcare, but sometimes the real news is so depressing. What can I possibly do to change what is going on? Doesn’t it make you feel helpless at times?
And reading about celebrities? Sometimes it makes you feel good that your life will never be as screwed up as theirs. Same reason I like Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant.
So anyway back to Jen. Turns out she started dating this Justin Theroux guy and he had a girlfriend of 14 years! And all I can think is “hey! you just did the same thing that someone did to you years ago!” Of course, there’s always the excuse of bad timing, but if it quacks like a duck…
I shouldn’t care, right? But I do. I look at her differently now, just like I looked at Meg Ryan differently after she left Dennis Quaid for Russel Crowe, and just how I still change the radio station if a Chris Brown song comes on.
Obviously celebrities should never be seen as role models, but I can still choose who I send good vibes to and who I send bad vibes to. Jen=bad vibes.
And now, I hope you will all keep reading my blog even though I realize how incredibly crazy I sound that I was even able to write a whole post on this.
Are you a celebrity watcher? Or a celebrity-hater? Any thoughts on Jen?
20 comments
I read US Weekly religiously. (I used to have a subscription.) J wonders why I care so much but when I have a little tidbit about one of his favorite actors/actresses, he’s all over it!
I absolutely love pop culture so I enjoyed this post. There are three sides to every story, but it does seem off. Who am I to judge, though? xoxo
So….do ya think O.J. Simpson really DID confess to Oprah??
I now think less of you not because of your love of celebrities, but because of your love of Angelina Jolie 🙂 Never been a fan, even before she went all homewrecker. Vials of blood around her neck? No thanks!
Bravo for being brave enough to admit it! It isn’t crazy. You’re right. The “real” news is so depressing. Much of the time I have E! News on in the background when I am home. I am not as into it as you, but I still keep up and I am addicted to anything that has the Kardashians in it. They are just full of drama.
Ahh, I totally get it! I can’t help it. I love reading celebrity gossip. And I am, like you, a highly educated professional, who surrounds herself with other highly educated professionals and reads newspapers and political blogs and things like Slate and Salon and the New York Times and…yeah, I love People magazine. Hahaha. Who cares! We all have our trash, right?
One thing I LOVE is watching MTV’s 16 and Pregnant (don’t judge…). One time recently I found myself on a forum that was discussing the show, and it came out somehow that almost everyone on the board was INCREDIBLY well educated. Like, Ivy League graduate school lawyers and doctors and MBA types. Way more educated than me. Made me feel pretty good about myself. Haha.
Remember when we did one of those tours of Hollywood and Eric made fun of us?!?
Also, I miss you. I think I emailed you, but I don’t think you emailed me back. Email me! I wanna know how you’re doing!
I heart the fuck out of TMZ. I too have the app and People is in my mailbox every Saturday.
I’m a sponge for celebrity gossip. Even when I don’t purposely seek out celebrity news (which is rare, because let’s face it, I check out my celeb news before the REAL news), I always seem to know what’s going on with the stars.
I’ve never liked Jennifer Aniston. She seems like such a bitch.
We go to my parents’ house every Sunday night for family dinner. My mom has been kind enough to keep her subscription to People Magazine so I can read it.
The only time I, personally, ever purchased a People Magazine was when Jen and Brad broke up.
Since we cancelled cable I am seriously missing Teen Mom and 16 & Pregnant (and the Real Housewives of Orange County).
Sometimes, letting the drama of others be your entertainment is the perfect way to end the day.
I pretended that I was above celebrity gossip forever. And then… they created the awesomeness that is TMZ! If Harvey Levin wasn’t gay, man! I could eat him up with a spoon! So cute with his muscles & lawyerly nerdiness!
Yeah sometimes people will have conversations about the awfulness of celebrity gossip and either a) keep my mouth shut or b) mumble “yeah that’s stupid…” and try and change the subject.
I wish it were more socially acceptable. I think I’d find it easier to admit I’m an alcoholic than to say I’m obsessed with celebrity gossip.
Don’t be fooled to much by the gossipmedia. They don’t tell you what’s REAL they only tell you what SELLS.
Like Meg Ryan: she never left Quaid for Crowe. Quaid cheated on her for many years in the late nineites. As a result of Quaids cheating, their marriage was over and she moved on to another guy.
I loath gossipmagazines.
you are completely right! I looked it up and was shocked I had no knowledge of this. Well played.
I absolutely hear you on this one!! Stinkin’ quack-quack, Jen! 🙂
I didn’t know which team to be on with the Jen/Angelina thing either. I decided I still love them both, but Brad’s forever on my *Ech!* list. As for Meg Ryan… that one really bothered me. Everyone rallied up like they just loved the idea of the new couple, but … umm… hello? Celebrities or housekeepers, these are still human beings who have broken their vows. Poor Dennis. 🙁
No worries on getting a little off your normal blog focus. This post was very refreshing and entertaining. 🙂
LOL – your blog has decided I go by “Pa” now. Hee!
LOVE celebrity EVERYTHING! That is the “watch” in my blog title. I was devasted when Bruce and Demi broke up. And Meg and Dennis. And Tom and Nicole.
Oh, and I have the TMZ app, the IMDB app, and the eonline app. You are NOT alone. TMZ is the bomb!
As for what I think about Jen. When you leave a 14 year relationship – one person doesn’t suddenly make you want to leave. It was downhill for awahile. I dated my ex boyfriend for 6 years and I was never REALLY happy. I liked his company. He was funny. But he was TERRIBLE to me. Then I met my (now) husband and realized what a good relationship was like. It could have been the same with Justin. Also, Justin and his ex weren’t married. And probably for a reason. Sometimes you just need a good enough reason to end things and for me, meeting my future husband was enough to break it off with my horrible boyfriend.
So get back on that Jen train! The girl deserves some type of stable relationship after all the Brad/Vince/John Mayer business.
I LOVE celebrities….
I love trashy magazines.
I love access holywood.
LOVE IT ALL…
Its terrible I know, but It is one of y silly joys in life.
♥ theMRS.
oh girl, I totally love you! I have the People.com app and I check it several times a day! 51 yr old Lost actor marries 16 yr old country singer?? OMG! you’re right, you can’t help but get wrapped up in their lives and care. My hubby even knows that if he really wants to please me to not bring me home flowers but a gossip magazine instead. 🙂